An open letter to Microsoft on occasion of its new ads

Dear Microsoft,

I have always enjoyed your products. You revolutionized computing, and I thank you for that. You created a superior product and we all bought it. And you continue to innovate, or, and the very least - and you shouldn't apologize for this - bring the best innovations of others to the masses. Good for you.

But now you've brought us this new ad campaign where we can apparently broadcast ourselves saying that "I'm a PC and we like broccoli" or "I'm a PC and I appreciate ugly dogs" or whatever. Now I realize that, by using a PC, I must be a loser. That saddens me.

I always thought Mac users were a bunch of weirdos. Now I realize that it is my fellow PC users that are the weirdos. Mac users are like that hip dude in the commercial that you are now trying to make apologies for.

And I'm the pathetic fat guy.

I feel lost and alone. Thanks Microsoft. Maybe I'll just wait for Google to make an operating system.

Lots of love,
A Microsoft loser